Darren Hayes – Unlovable, my thoughts

The release of Darren’s memoir was basically the media event of the year for me. It’s something I’d been looking forward to since it was first announced and something I’d hoped would be made years before that.

Sadly the book wasn’t approved for release by Penguin Books UK, so I’ve only got ahold of the audiobook from Audible. I do plan to get a physical copy imported over, but I wanted the audiobook to be my first ‘read’ of it anyway, because it was narrated by Darren himself.

Themes and thoughts

The memoir covers a lot of Darren’s childhood, the unsteady and scary living situations he grew up in and what ultimately led him to write the amazing music he makes.

I’m not gonna lie it’s a difficult listen at quite a lot of points. I think what shocked me most is learning just how frequent and ongoing Darren’s struggles with depression are. The memoir is brutally honest and captivating, and a huge advocate for seeking therapy as an adult.

Eventually the memoir does get on to Savage Garden and the ‘glory days’ if you like. There were some fun little bits of information and things to be learned about how and why some of our favourite songs were written.

Homophobic Media

I’d recently listened to a podcast which covered George Michael’s life story, and oh my God, the parallels in Darren’s book are kinda crazy, especially when it comes to talking about record labels and how the media treated you as a gay musician in the 90s/00s.

Darren makes the comparison himself at some point in the book, I remember this part of his career particularly well myself because it was around the time that Darren released ‘Tension and The Spark’ that I was evolving in to a fully fledged fan.

There were a ton of stories I’d already heard from interviews over the year, I particularly loved hearing about his relationship with his mum and sister, and learning about their perspectives on his life was interesting.

What would I have liked to hear?

I think, for me anyway, I would have liked the memoir to cover more of his solo career. The book covers in great depth his childhood (which makes sense really), and then there’s a big segment on the Savage Garden days.

Being HUGELY in to ‘This Delicate Thing We’ve Made’ I would have liked to have heard more from that time period. It felt glanced over in comparison but perhaps there was just far less going on in Darren’s life behind the scenes at that point.

Worth listening to?

Oh absolutely, specially as a fan of Darren. But I think it’s an interesting listen to anyone who’s interested in similar artists, who’ve gone through similar things. I could see a George Michael, Freddie, or Sam Smith fan really picking some stuff up from his chapters on struggling with his label and perceptions of him from the media.

It does come around on the low points and ultimately we reach the man who released ‘Homosexual’; the unapologetic queer and self realised artist we know and love today. But oh boy, it wasn’t easy, in fact it was much harder than I ever knew. How Darren managed to make it through everything thrown at him over the years is incredible, and the book makes you want to do your best in everything you’re faced with yourself.

You can download Unlovable from Amazon here!